Mattress madness

Did anyone know how convoluted buying a mattress is? We spent the entire day..well afternoon (last night involved some intensive wine guzzling) buying a bed and mattress ......and also the two other essential items for a new home - a wine rack shaped like a Egyptian pharaoh and an urn suitable for tall flowers or possibly umbrellas.

After buying our Egyptian fellow and faux antique urn, we engulfed a McDonald and walked into the longest shopping experience of our lives. The minute we walked into a branch of the "northeast's foremost furniture retailer", Thea. our furnishings consultant, pounced on us. After asking a few key questions, to work out how much commission she would be able to get out of us, she launched into a speech about the wonderful world of bed and mattress buying (mentioning numerous times that she had been doing this for 13 years and we were in very good hands.) At this point there was no escape - dazed and confused we were ushered on into the depths of the shop - which I'm convinced is designed like a casino, where you can't find the exit once your in.

So we did as Thea told us and walked around the "bedroom gallery" to select our new bed. Throughout the entire time, Thea followed us at a reasonable distance around the shop, comically jumping behind leather barkaloungers every time we looked round at her. It was bizarre.

Anyway we found a bed that looked great and wasn't too expensive..all good. But then Thea went into overdrive and led us to the mattress area and an experience never to be repeated. After another lengthy lecture about the right way to choose a mattress we spent maybe 2 HOURS picking the bloody thing. There are rules to this people.....first you have to decide if you are a plush person, a firm person or a pillow top person. I truly believed I would be a firm person but once I had tried the plush my whole world was turned upside down - beds are not meant to feel that good).
So plush it was, the next stage can be called - how much money do you want your plush to cost you. We entered the plush room where obviously they make you try the most expensive (and best) first so everything else seems crap. Many minutes passed as we bounced from mattress to mattress before a final decision was made. I'm not going to tell you how much we spent because it is very embarrassing but for the next what 10 years sleeping is going to kick ass!!!!!

We finally left the store, go in the car and couldn't move from sheer exhaustion. The Thea experience is not one to take lightly.

Mwaaa

Listening to: The Chris Moyles Show (sad I know)

Feeling: Sleepy

Discovering: humidity is not healthy for the British countenance.